Gay Dogs (by request)

Right, deep breaths all round and let's get through this one as quickly as possible.

Pedigree & Chum

Now, the naysayers may scoff but it is a statistical, zoological and societal fact that some dogs are gay.

Some breeds are exclusively gay - the Japanese chin, pomeranians, Welsh terriers of course. Dingos are almost exclusively gay and only mate strictly as a biological necessity to ensure the future of the breed. Obversely, it's a popular misconception that poodles are gay. Poodles aren't the slightest bit gay, poodles are proper rock. Don't be taken in by stereotypes and think before you start patting, belly-scratching or fiddling with your flies in secluded car parks.

I RUV YOU!!!

Individual dogs are are also friends of Dorothy and it goes without saying that the world of entertainment has more than its fair share of mince terriers. Forget Lassie, he just needed the work, the first publicly gay dog on television was Huckleberry Hound. Not only did he make it acceptable for alternative-lifestyle canines to be represented in popular media but he aslo consolidated his breakthrough by giving Yogi Bear his big break. From that point gay figures, animal and human, became the norm on the television. Huckleberry Hound became the face of the LGBT movement until legal challenges from Hanna Barbera over image rights in the late 1970s, the rainbow flag was subsequently adopted as an alternative. Heterosexual television presenter Dermot O'Leary is rumoured to have a Huckleberry Hound tattoo in an intimate area. 

His bell-end.

Not all stars had the courage of their convictions however, Aramis from Dogtanian & the Muskehounds spent his entire career in fear of being outed, he married a dalmatian and had seven litters of pups to provide a smokescreen for his secret shame. If only he'd known that Milady was a popular face on the animated French gay scene at the time. His double life was only revealed when someone drew a picture of his funeral at the Paris pet cemetery in which his widow meets a string of his ex-lovers.

Are gay dogs dead though? That's what you're asking and you're right to do so. As we have seen above some undoubtedly gay dogs have sadly passed, so it wouldn't be fair to then single out and name, for example, Roxy Irwin - the Briar Lane Boner, just to prove the point conclusively would it? Yes, he definitely cocked more than his leg, but he mightn't want the world to know about it. The least we can do is respect his privacy (to dog-bot his way around the impoverished streets of Throckley). I have it on questionable authority that other dogs not known to me personally were fond of the flexi-lead but I'm not going to name names. I don't want Peter Tatchell on my back, again.

Humpers of the left leg, we salute you.

Status: Dead, Alive & Immortal

Telltale Sign: Hides the remote when Will & Grace is on.

In Three Words: A New Low?